Et tu, Brute?

What a crummy week.

TGIF doesn't even begin to express how I feel about today being Friday... And yet, that fact doesn't inspire any real hope, today. I just get to spend a weekend dealing with more of the "same old same old".

I haven't really had much time to write this week, which is too bad, because I've got a couple of different topics bouncing around my intracranial block.

Two come to mind... one, Rage, I'll have to deal with later. Today, a good topic seems to be BETRAYAL.

Because, while on Tuesday my overriding emotional balance was interfered with by a recurring bout with rage, today, my universe is rocked by the realization of betrayal.

Until very recently, I assumed that the people I served on a board of directors with were a team, a cohesive unit dedicated to one thing... service to our organization. I trusted them.

It is a shock to come to the conclusion that I am so utterly naive.

At a meeting this week, 5 of us were present. A decision was reached that a certain situation would be dealt with in a particular way, a way that was pastoral and appropriate... or rather, the person in charge indicated she would deal with said situation in a particular manner, and no one expressed disagreement with that approach.

And yet, one of those five individuals felt it incumbent upon them to run off and, for all intents and purposes, go behind the backs of the board and deal with the situation in a totally different manner... one that was both UNPASTORAL and INAPPROPRIATE.

Of the five, I know which three did NOT do it. That leaves two, one of whom I consider a dear friend, and the other whom I like very much.

I am so hurt and disgusted by this that I don't even know what further to say.

I will be so glad when my office expires in one month.

Funny, betrayal leads directly to that other topic, RAGE. I guess I won't go into that.

God is my Copilot

Friday I went flying.

It was my first experience flying (as a passenger) in a small plane. The opportunity arose at almost the last minute. I certainly hadn't expected when I got up Friday morning that by noon I'd be in the air.

Friday was a chilly day, relatively strong winds (20 mph) with gusts to 35 mph. I don't like turbulence when I'm in a jet... so, I was a bit concerned prior to takeoff. Sure enough, as our little plane plunged into the sky, things got rough. I grabbed hold of the bottom of my chair, and the back of the pilot's seat, holding on for dear life... but after a few minutes, I was able to calm down enough to enjoy the experience.

At one point in our flight, we approached a sizeable airport runway at a 90 degree angle, then banked left and nosed down to align with the runway. For a brief moment, it felt as though we hung, motionless in the sky.

The key to this is trust. As my stomach churned through that first rough few minutes, I had to rely on the laws of aerodynamics, trusting that those wouldn't change! I also had to trust in my pilot's skills. Surely he wouldn't have taken me up if he wasn't confident in his ability to manage the plane!

I think life is like that. I've seen a few bumper-stickers that read "God is my co-pilot". I've always silently nodded to that thought. After this flight, I was inclined to write that God shouldn't be our copilot, but rather our pilot.

But more reflection has shown me a lot about that. In a way, God IS our pilot... but God is also our copilot. Perhaps, the best comparison is between that of a rookie pilot, learning how to fly, still striving to earn his pilot's license, who is partnered with a far more experienced copilot/instructor.

A copilot can only fly the plane if the pilot relinquishes the controls. In the case of a rookie or student pilot, when conditions become far too extreme for the limited experience of the pilot, the wise thing to do is to relinquish control to the far more experienced pilot. And yet, the rookie always has the right by virtue of the law and tradition, to resume command of the plane at any time.

From my perspective, our daily journey is a lot like that situation. When life is easy, it's fun to fly solo. But at times, life's experiences can get out of hand. Turbulence becomes unbearable, and it seems like our life is going to come crashing down about us... it's normal to seek out the smallest things that we can control. By doing so we hope to gain control of the larger picture. But in times like that, it's good to surrender control to our COPILOT. God is ready to help through those times, but is always ready to give us control back when we want.

To paraphrase scripture, "But for me and my plane, we're turning it over to the copilot!"

!snort!

So. There!